Does he like me? It’s a question as old as time and yet whether you’re eighteen years old or forty, it never seems to get any easier to answer. I reached out to my friend James, a relationship coach in New York City in order to pick his brain about how men express interest in women they want to pursue.
Plucking petals off a flower reciting, “He likes me, he likes me not” won’t give you your answer. And believe it or not, a magic 8 ball won’t give you your answer either. Guys can be difficult to read, especially when trying to figure out if they have a crush on you.
While there’s no way to be absolutely sure of his intentions unless you flat out ask him, this list of the best does he like me signs for adults should help you determine if it’s all in your head or not.
7. His Personality Changes Around You
Guys often behave differently when they are around someone they like. “His demeanor in social settings versus your personal interactions together should give you a good clue”. Maybe he gets slightly nervous, fidgety, or has a little trouble making eye contact. He might even ramble. These are all subtle signs you should keep an eye out for.”
Further, if he downplays your relationship to others, or has flat out told others that he doesn’t know you, he is most likely trying to play it cool and keep you a secret for the meantime. Childish, I know – but men can be that way some times.
6. He Sent You A Friend Request
We live in a world where social media interactions are the norm. People always have their eyes glued to their phones and react to Facebook notification sounds like one of Pavlov’s dogs. So if a guy wants to include you in his social world, there’s a good chance he likes you. Additionally, if he adds you on Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, and Instagram in instant succession – woah, boy!
To delve further into this, Facebook has recently changed their news feed algorithms in order to help you see what Facebook thinks you want to see. This means that people you interact with frequently – and let’s face it, stalk – will appear in your news feed more frequently than those people you are friends with for simply no reason other than acquaintance. That being said, if he is one of the first to interact with your newest posts, there is enough proof to suggest that he is routinely looking at your profile – or he just spends too much time on social media.
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it’s also worth pointing out his trends on social media sites like Facebook and Instagram. Does he like a lot of other girl’s photos, especially selfies? If he is generally inactive on these sites, but has a lengthy history of interacting with your posts, then he probably has a thing for you. I don’t have any scientific evidence to support this claim, but I think the implications are clear.
5. You Frequently Lock Eyes
Let’s face it, a man’s eye will gravitate towards an attractive female whenever the opportunity arises. If you frequently find yourself locking eyes with a guy – whether it’s in the office, at the gym, or in the club – then it’s safe to assume that he has some feelings for you (1). But don’t stare hoping to catch him in the act, accidental awkward eye contact is a thing, and it might be a turn off for some guys. Let it happen naturally, because if you like each other then it certainly will.
4. He Teases You
Regardless of age, men are notorious for teasing their crushes. “If he is extra playful with you, pokes fun at you, or teases you, then he probably likes you”, says James. “There aren’t many signs stronger than that”.
Furthermore, perhaps his schoolyard antics will carry over into other social settings. For example, “if you find out that he leaves your name out of the conversation or that he has told others that he literally doesn’t know who you are – don’t get upset. It’s possible that he is hiding his acquaintance with you for good reason.” Maybe he doesn’t want anyone to blow his cover, or perhaps he doesn’t want to hear the pity in case things with you don’t work out. He may even be afraid that someone else might swoop in and try o steal you from him. Whatever the reason may be, don’t be too quick to assume the guy isn’t interested.
3. He Remembers Things About You
If a guy is interested in you, he will listen when you talk. He wants to remember important details about you – hobbies, fears, strength, weaknesses, likes and dislikes. That being said, you will notice that he always remembers things about you and what you have said. It’s not often that guys give their full attention, but when we do, take notice.
2. He Ignores You
Some guys like to play the hard to get game. You can test out this sign by giving him a little extra attention. You can even ask him to hang out with you or with a group of you and your friends. If he likes you he won’t be able to resist.
Be careful though, you don’t want to seem desperate. “If you give him too much attention, you might push him away”, says James. “Guys like to play a little chase sometimes too. If he doesn’t take the bait, back off a little”.
But remember, guys make time for those who they are interested in. If he is constantly dodging, cancelling, rescheduling, etc. then there is a very good chance that he does not like you. If he likes you, he will have to stop ignoring you to gain back your attention at some point.
1. He Talks To You
When a guy is crushing hard on a girl, he will do whatever he can to keep the conversation alive.
“Give him a few triggers – a television show you’ve been watching, a sport you played in high school – and see where the conversation goes. If he tried to keep the conversation moving like it’s a campfire in the arctic circle, then it’s safe to assume that he likes you”, says James.
“Sometimes he will ask you random questions just to keep the conversation going. Other times he might brag a little to make sure you understand how cool he is. Be assured, if he takes every opportunity to get a word in with you, he likes you.”
Similarly, “Does he talk to you about things you know you’ve already talked about? Perhaps he just wants to talk about anything and just remembers things that have clicked with you in the past.”
Does He Like Me Signs
How many of these does he like me signs for adults does your crush exhibit? If you’ve been looking through this list saying “He does this” or “He’s done that a bunch of times”, then stop worrying about whether or not he likes you – he very clearly does have feelings for you. Get the ball rolling. Let him know you like him too. You don’t have to wait for him to make his move. Tell him you’re interested and let things progress from there.